3 months

Halloween 2015

A firefight in duty clothes, a strawberry, Rapunzel, and a last minute witch.

We were a little unprepared for us adults this year. :)

With it being on a Saturday, my school's carnival was in the afternoon. Kasila had a ball! 

Sack races…. she was a champ! She kept going and trying until she finished it. I wasn't sure how she'd do, but she blew me away with how well she did it. She is always surprising me with her skills!

Fishing was her favorite stop :)

After the carnival, we spent the even at the fire station. She ran around like she owned the place and the trucks while I enjoyed hanging out with Lynnix and passing out the candy to the kids that came by.

Back to Work

I was most definitely NOT ready to go back to school this time. 

I think it's because I didn't have time to get bored with Kasila running around. I even ended up with an extra week because of our quick trip to Oregon. The day came and it was a tough one for me, and sometimes it still is. I have to remind myself that for the betterment of my family, I need to keep working for a little while longer. Scott is doing what he needs to do (finishing school) and I would not change that so I 100% support him in that endeavor.  That doesn't mean that I happily go every day, but it does mean that I'm trying not to dwell on it too much. I do still enjoy my job, it's just tougher this time around. I have felt a little bit of the postpartum effects. I can be more snappy and more easily hurt. It's not fun, but I take a step back, say a little prayer and keep going. We'll get though this, it's not forever. 

This was the night before I had to go back to work.

Life...

October was a rough month for me. It has taken me a while to post, but it's probably because I wouldn't have been able to get through it before now…We'll see how now goes.

Before my mom came to visit after Lynnix, I knew that my grandpa had taken a turn for the worse. His Alzheimer's had been gradually getting worse, but he had a few days stay in the hospital. Before he could come home, my grandma had to get their home ready for him and get a hospital bed. As time went on, he didn't bounce back. I received a call from mom after she had gone back home and it was not what I wanted to hear. She asked me to talk to Grandpa through Skype. He wasn't responding to much of anything and wasn't really eating. It was probably one of the hardest things I ever had to do. It was also a moment that I truly hated living so far away. I was crying before I even said a word. It was really hard with Kasila being here as well. She didn't truly understand what was happening, but knew that Grandpa wasn't acting like people normally would. She starting getting pretty upset also because I was so upset. However, I was able to talk to Grandpa and express my love and appreciation for him. Even though he couldn't respond, I know that he heard and understood me. Two days later, my mom called and told me that they had thought they had lost him, but he came back to them. From what I'm told, my dad gave Grandpa a priesthood blessing that evening, a releasing blessing. Grandpa passed away the following morning. 

I was suppose to go back to work two days later…I ended up going to our work day since there wouldn't be students there, but was able to have my sub work an additional week. We booked our plane tickets to fly down. I had a lot of time to think about Grandpa and all that he means to me. I learned a lot from him, but some of it is hard to put into words. I know how he made me feel around him, and I loved it. He taught, and then paid, me to mow his lawn- even though he never let my mom touch a lawn mower and I didn't always do it up to his standard. I loved the way that he would joke and play and work. He was also a great example of a righteous priesthood holder. Even on vacation, he and  Grandma would kneel together for pray and read their scriptures. He will be greatly missed, but he is much better off than all of us. He is free of the restraint of his physical body and mind. I am so happy that he doesn't have to deal with knowing that he isn't able to do/remember the things that he wants. I am so grateful for the knowledge of the Plan of Salvation and that Grandpa was ready for it. Even though it is a sad and rough time for us left behind, there is happiness in it for all.

There were A LOT of tears shed over the few days that we were there, but there were also some good times. We celebrated Grandpa's life, people were able to meet Lynnix, and Kasila was able experience the farm and corn maze. 

Lynnix's first flight.. waiting to board.

Grandma Dickerson with Lynnix

Kasila was wore out from playing with Uncle Ken and everyone else...

It was a lovely, warm day when we had Grandpa's funeral. Scott was a pall bearer and Kasila kept asking him for his flower. Once the service was over, he took his flower and put it on her headband. She wore it the rest of the day.

Lynnix's middle name is Mae, after Grandpa Dickerson's mom. We stopped by and paid her a visit as well.

Kasila could have spent days out at the farm and corn maze. Her favorite thing was the zip line. 

2 Months +